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I need finesse. She is her own person. An individual who is entitled to different likes, interests and hobbies. How boring she would be if all she did was act as a mirror to you, right?
So I think, in a way, she is right in saying: this is your issue. She isn't changing YOU are. She is happy in her personal life.
While you seem unfulfilled. You've decided that you want to be closer to her now, because you have nothing once the move on, etc. And I think its incumbent upon you to find fulfillment in your life. Develop your own hobbies, interests and goals. Be happy with your own person.
That said this is only one-half of the issue. You are part of a couple.
Marriage is a union of two individuals, creating a partnership. So, if the two individuals are whole and happy in their own right, then absolutely the partnership deserves attention and equal importance. The partnership is the other half of the equation and it seems like your wife isn't hearing you in your request to pay attention to the partnership.
The partnership needs time, attention and focus too. Not just you as individuals. I think your success, or rather the success of the partnership, lies in the two of you making a concerted effort to nurture the partnership not change the other's hobbies, and individual focus. Start with that. I find that walking our dogs after dinner together in the evenings is a great time to connect. Drives in the car together are fabulous there are no other distractions.
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Couple wants xxx dating virtual dating my workplace's employee evaluation process.
This is a new process that's been put into place for no specific reason that they want to share I asked. First you fill out this template and evaluate yourself. Then your boss fills it out and you compare. Then you negotiate on what your final score be. I resent it in particular because there's no goal or purpose to this exercise. The evaluations do not mean cash bonuses, promotions etc. It's just a stressful process to go through with no real outcome.
What happens if I put "above average" in a column and my boss puts "below average"? In fact, I'd be tempted to short change myself just to avoid an awkward conversation.
There is value to annual employee evaluations, but there needs to be an outcome or a goal to the process. We're supposed to start doing this every six months. But I have read and replied. Not into all the and out there. So please don't waste my time.